/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>46367716 (2/2—p1/2)
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Floating through the bamboo in the Lost Forest of the Bamboo, I come to a terrible realization: it's another boring day…

Gensokyo has recently become a collection of boring days: people have these focused eyes and never stop to rest; their minds racing so much it's impossible to get off a good prank on them. Long gone are the days the lazy miko wouldn't even notice when her sugar and salt were swapped or when nails were piledrived into her shoes; now she's perceptive of everything and makes sure to boast those scary fire wings every single day! Bleh, Junko's are cooler, even though they aren't wings!

Still, so boring. I wonder what's driving people to be so tense and unfun these days…

Hm?

Something further ahead calls my attention, and I noticed with some pride I'd stumbled upon Eientei. Not everyone can do such without getting lost or caught by one of Tewi's masterpieces~Still, the thing that calls my attention is one of the backyards surrounded by bamboo fences, ground filled with grass and packed dirt, chimes sounding with the soft wind as people—rabbits, the mostly retarded type of people—come and go, their eyes drawn to the same place as mine. Playing on the dirt and with wooden toys were a bunch of mini-humans and mini-youkais, a quite familiar rabbit overlooking them: the purple hair, the weird uniform and the gaze of a girl too tired to work properly… Yep, that's Reisen; that dumbass Junko seems to like a lot. What's she doing with all those mini-people?

Though a better question would be: how fun would it be to make them all go insane~?

… Actually, better not. Junko and Hecatia—ALL three of them, ugh…—scolded me for being a disappointment recently when I lost to those two jerks, so it wouldn't be a good idea to prank someone Junko personally likes. Boring questions, boring resolutions.

I wanna cry.

Eh, anyway. “Yo, Reisen!” I yell, flying towards the rabbit and her herd—or was it murder? The mini-people stared in awe, some trying to reach for me and my glamorous attire.

Reisen looks ten times more tired as our gazes lock. “A fairy AND you on top of that…?” She mumbles, pinching the tip of her nose. I show her tongue before playing with a mini-rabbit. So tiny and fluffy~! “If you hurt the children, I'll blast you.”

I chuckled, staring at her and ignoring the weird glares the big—'big'—rabbit nurses gave me. “Nah, trying to brighten your lives’d only make Junko-san all pissy.” I shrug and scoop up the mini-rabbit into my arms; he’s so soft and cuddly~! I hum, my cheeks red as my chest puffs with fuzziness. “Whatcha doing?”

“Ugh… I’m acclimating the babies to nature,” she shows a wooden board full of boring papers and boring letters, sighing in annoyance before massaging her left wrist. “It's important for their development to feel nature and be able to explore it… Though they're still babies, so it must be done in a closed environment.” A yawn finishes her sentence and an 'oooooohhh~' starts mine, giggling as teeny tiny hands pull on my cheeks. “And what are you doing here, Clownpiece? Weren't you supposed to be in Hell or something?”

“I'm looking for something fun to do—pranking is getting boring with all the half-assed reactions of people too stuck-up in their own asses to enjoy disgrace!” I turn upside down, hair cascading down together with the rabbit’s ears, other babies watching and letting out sweet shrieks. Ah, I love these little guys and gurls~they are avid chaos agents, always ruining the lives of their caretakers and being too cute to bear responsibility or punishment. My idols. “Hey, you're a medic, right?” She tries to form a response, but it'd likely be very boring, so I work with a presumable yes. “Tell me: What illness has been causing people to be so tense and unfun?” I take a seat by her side, letting go of the baby rabbit. Reisen sighs again—she's doing that a lot, huh?—and looks back at the corridor, not a single nurse to be seen anymore.

“Well, it's not an illness per se. You may not be aware, but a lot has been brewing around the surface—a political rebellion, a brothel that has defied common sense and, mainly…” She gazes at the babies prowling around. “A massive pregnancy crisis. About our entire work force here at Eientei is either pregnant or has given birth already; 2% of adult women in the Human Village are pregnant; 1% in the Underground; and, among Youkai, the number is mostly unfathomable. Things are drastically changing and hardly anyone has the mind or leniency to take it easy… So people are so tense and not up to having harmless fun because they're very worried about the future.”

I nod slowly, understanding very little of her words. “That means you look like crap because you're pregnant?” I poked her belly, causing her to whip my hand away.

“N-No, I'm not pregnant—wait, how do you know about…?”

“Reimu. I saw her daughter leave her no-no hole! Their screams were very funny~”

Reisen stares at me as if I had grown a second head.

I'll give her an angry mating press at least