/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>45576441
The two bickering bitches near-instantly verbally halt after hearing the sudden scream. Who the hell was Benkei? Is he safe? Is he okay?

“...I’m not so sure about this anymore. We’ve been here 20 minutes so far and I’ve heard nothing but a good time happening out there. Are you guys positive this isn’t just an actual birthday party?” Lemontene asked her friends with an… unusually somber tone. The heck’s her problem today?

Rikako adjusted her glasses, excited to flaunt her ego and infodump. “Well you see, It’s not unusual for vile & villainous operations to be hidden under a friendly cloak like this. If I recall correctly, just last year that wicked hermit that likes corpses a little too much did exactly this. She hosted a “block party” at her residence one night and BOOM! Immediately the next day there’s a sudden jiang-shi outbreak. This “party” being composed almost entirely of filthy big-name know-it-alls isn’t helping its case either. Call it a hunch or educated guess, but I bet in 5 minutes they’ll be sacrificing children into a scalding caldron made with the lemonade sample they stole. No way in hell somebody like Mima or Yukka would set up a random birthday party without an ulterior motive.”

“Well if you say so.” ‘Tene affirmed. If going through with this plan meant everyone in Gensokyo could be happy again, it was worth a shot to the irregular fruit fairy. “So when are we gonna strike? My cricket gear makes it uncomfortable to move around in this Barrel :(”

“Alright, listen up. Currently, We’re in the stakeout phase. You two can relax for now, as I will be the one keeping maintenance on these fowl heathens. However, as soon as I see anything that appears to be malicious about to occur, I’ll shout our keyword three times in a row to signal it’s go time. Ruukoto, You’ll start us off by releasing the smoke bomb to distract everyone. Then you will quickly start keeping any sort of backup like Alice’s annoying doll collection at bay so they can't interrupt our plan.”

“Roger that!”

“Lemontene, You’re the most nimble person here so you’ll be in charge of escorting any innocent civilians out of here before things get ugly. Like that Hana kid. Despite this being her party, I highly doubt she’s in on whatever’s really going on here.”

“Aye Aye, Captain!”

“And finally: I’ll be operating on the interrogative offense after you two get finished with your tasks. With my new ammoless gun, I shall use it to threaten the remaining goons for any possible interrogatable answers on what’s truly been going on behind the scenes of the Hakurei Shrine Experience and it's relation to Mima. Ideally there’ll be no need for any physical violence on our end, but if push comes to shove then I give you guys full permission to help beat the living snot out of these guys.”

“Wow… I have no words. You really put a lot of thought into this! I feel so much more confident about everything now.” Ruukoto replied, dangerously close to sounding like a yesman.

Rikako smiled. “Thank you! I’ve played this scenario out in my head nearly 50 times after we left my lab. It's a little messy but there’s almost no way this could feasibly go wrong for us. Those jobbers will need a couple thousand miracles to come anywhere near being victorious here.”