/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>45474759 (23/-—p3)
—
The words leave me and at the same moment I feel my body weighting a ton with a burning, ugly regret, eyes wide because I just don't know why—that's the truth. It is! Then why…

"I'm s-sorry…" She whimpers, and I freeze, looking down. "I'm sorry—I'm sorry—I'm so sorry…" She holds the sides of her head, trembling nonstop, on the brink of hyperventilation. "I just did what I thought would help us—I don't want my children t-to starve… the village won't accept me, won't buy from me, they try to scam me because I'm weak and illiterate—It gets colder every passing winter, I can't let the stove run all day because fuel is expensive, winter clothes are so expensive too; living is so expensive—I'm sorry, I'm so sorry—"

She's sobbing, body quivering. What the…

… I can see Mystia as clear as day. I remember her hovering above us, singing music that called death upon us, reasoning her children's murder.

It was easy to see her as just that murderer until now.

"Stop." I say firmly—or try, lower lip trembling.

Mystia's face went through a thousand and one expressions—confusion, rage, perplexity—before settling up in something impossible to thoroughly describe, eyes wide and teeth clenched, hands holding onto the bark behind her, head lowered, tears rolling, her voice choked. "W-What do you even want from me…?" I can't answer immediately because I do not know. I came here on a whim, a burning passion to make her aware of the accomplishments of the children she never gave a chance to, get a reaction out of it… It was unfulfilling as it was indulgent—with the words about her family, deeply disturbing.

I hold Aki and Kuramochi to me, searching for an answer, my eyes tensing up when they come. "I… wanted to prove a point." Shrinking against the bark and trembling, Mystia looks at me, apparently as surprised as I was. "That you were wrong—that they could have made it if you had given them a chance… Or maybe to appease my ego. To say I'm better than you…" It darkens my insides to say those words; the regret a raging flame. It felt nice to rub it against her face when I didn't know best, to call her an animal, use myself as an example of overcoming unsurmountable odds…

But history shows it can always get worse.

A part of my mind screams she deserves all this: Mystia committed unforgivable sins; she deserves every ill and abuse that comes to her… The other looks at that door and remembers that behind it there's a close to empty pantry; some poor souls that'll grow up in this harsh environment and, just like their mother, be illiterate. They won't know any better because the only place that they could go for it, the village, will never accept them.

A stagnant cycle of wrongness, of mothers and fathers throwing their sons and daughters to death so to increase chance of survival of the nest…

… Human children are happy and run in the streets, bellies full and ignorant of the hardships of life. In winter, they cuddle with their parents in cozy homes.

It's been decades since a human has been eaten.

I bite my lower lip, narrowing my eyes and holding tight Kuramochi and Aki as if they were anchors. Bitterly, I remember the other babies in Eientei—so many hybrids… What'll be of them? Will they have to see their siblings perish? Go hungry; huddle in dark corners to preserve heat?

The venom is insidious and caustic, yet it corrodes ideals easily: there are people out there that have to resort to atrocities to just scrape by, disassociating with justifications; there are children that cannot read because of the way they were born into this world.

I look at Kuramochi and Aki—the babies that I know for such short time but gleefully call mine—and can't help but question myself: If I had never saved them; gone through everything I did… Would've I accepted them into my class?

That venom has a name and is 'truth'.

… No. I wouldn't have.

I want to cry…

But I do not cry.

Because in my arms there's hope and responsibility—both much greater than I'd have imagined when I held them for the first time.

In front of me stands a murderer, a mother. Her eyes are desperate, her body shakes—yet, even without realizing it, she blocks the door to her house.

I would've had to go through her to enter.

"Mystia…" She jolts, mumbling 'I'm sorry', tears still falling. I breathe in and breathe out, holding dearly to my children. "I'll never forgive you for what you did. You threw these two to death…" She tries again to mumble, but I cut her, my heart pounding and my eyes wild. "But… I don't want that to continue! I don't want your children throwing their children off the nest, so the rest can survive! I don't want to live knowing that could be avoided…! I want the children of Gensokyo to be raised to be happy, to smile, and to learn! To not be killed for things they can't control! I WANT TO CHANGE THE HUMAN VILLAGE!" Aki and Kuramochi are crying after that ardent yell.

Mystia stares, wide-eyed. There’s hope in those eyes.

>>36842755
She probably has hollow bones, which means you could punch her in half if she acted up!

>>19611195
But I didn't know it was bad to have lewd thoughts about smol!
You can't judge a man for a crime he didn't even know he was committing! Where are my rights?!

>>18135085
Fucking Christ, that's not how you treat Mystia. Delete this.