/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

Why is Saten-san so lovely?

[Anonymous No.]

Feel free to explain her appeal as I see nothing but a big breasted brainless emo teenager.

[Anonymous No.]

because she is the secret harem lead of railgun?

[Anonymous No.]

Why is Saten-san so reported?

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019706
personally i like her hairpin

[Anonymous No.]

Why is her role so limited?
She didnt even appeared alongside Uiharu for fuck sake in Index.
Are JC staff stupid or something? Without her, Railgun would have been a massive failure.

[Anonymous No.]

Because she's a slut with a toxic vagina

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019706
>middle schooler with petite breasts
fix'd

[Anonymous No.]

It's a mystery, I still liker her even now.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019745
If that is your idea of small breasts, I would hate to see your concept of large breasts.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019782
mogudan

[Anonymous No.]

my life for saten

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7019706
She only has big breasts in the anime.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019817
Which is canon.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019832
Get out JCstaff devs!

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7019832
No it isn't. Most of the anime is made up and has nothing to do with the manga.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019832

You're forgetting that you're talking to a person who gets disability checks for being retarded. Seriously.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019913
Why are you so hidoi to Sudo?

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019898
Kazuma Kamachi wrote the episodes of the anime too you dumb piece of shit.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019898
Which in turn is made up and has nothing to do with the novels.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019935

Why even bother? Didn't you read >>7019913

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019913
>/jp/
>not retarded

[Anonymous No.]

>>>/a/

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019945

Quit posting anonymously, Sudo.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7019913
>he thinks everyone who is disabled is retarded!
>>7019935
That's not even relevant. We were talking about Saten's breast size in the first place, and the fact that it changes so much in the anime and not at all in the manga is because JC Staff doesn't know how to be consistent.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019958
Saten-san looks like a real high ojou-sama there.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019958
Do you have legal rights? If you need someone to sign legal documents for you, you are retarded.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7019970
Yes, I have legal rights. I've signed all my documents related to my cases. I'm on SSI for severe depression and anxiety, not for autism or whatever meme you want to spew.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019981
/jp/ - Sudo's Blog

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019981
I am autistic and they rehabilitated me. You got on SSI for depression? Seriously?

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7019983
I know, right?

[Anonymous No.]

>>7019996
Do it, fucking rename it!
>>7020000
Sick quads

[No.1 Sudo Fan !4Lz7IzRcvI No.]

>>7020000
Nice quads Sudo-sama

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7019996
Yeah. It has more to do with the anxiety, though.
>>7020010
>>7020015
Thanks.

[Anonymous No.]

So what's up with this abusing Saten is cool meme? Why is that most of her fan-pics consist of her being abused in some sadistic way?

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020033
They're horrible people who hate women.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020033
The more pure something is the more fun to taint. etc.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020023
So why haven't they brainwased... er, rehabilitated you yet?

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020033
Most of her fan arts depicting her as a slut are drawn by women, don't ask me why.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020080
I don't know. As long as they keep sending the checks I don't really care. I hate people and don't really have any desire to be around them anymore.

[Anonymous No.]

Sudo-san, I hope you weren't banned.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,1
Don't worry, I wasn't.

[Anonymous No.]

SHIT JANITOR DELETING GOOD THREADS AND LEAVING SHIT THREADS AS IT IS FUCK

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,3
>good thread
>Saten
>Sudo blogging

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,4
Better than the nuke thread and the "gook" thread.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,5
Not really, no.

[Kuroko spammer No.]

Why is 4chan dead? Just when I was going to make a thread too.

[A.J.chama No.]

Sudo, why are you such a shitposter?

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,8

He can't help it, he's actually autistic.

[A.J.chama No.]

>>7020092,9
Poor guy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,7
Hooray, more anime spams are coming. This is indeed the most exciting time of the day!xD Who gives a shit.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,11
BBCODE MASTER

[Anonymous No.]

Sudo makes me shake my head. The simplest concept he can't accept and makes excuses like a five year old.

I'll say it again. Do not discuss anime at all on /jp/. No excuses. No bull shit. Don't do it Sudo.

[Anonymous No.]

GET OUT SUDO DEVS

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,8
You're the biggest shitposter on /jp/. That coming from you is both hilarious and hypocritical. Why don't you go spam >Sion some more?
>>7020092,9
>Herp derp autism memes memes am I cool yet?
>>7020092,13
I'll discuss whatever I want, and you'll either accept it or filter me.

[Suigin !mercury/qA No.]

>>7020092,15
all his >Sion posts are better than your animes reacting pictures

[Suigin !mercury/qA No.]

which are in fact 90% of your post history

[Suigin !mercury/qA No.]

you fucking shitposter

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,16
They're all anime reaction images too, you retard. Why don't you go spam aikido and other various copypasta? Both of you idiots accusing me of shitpostign when most of your post history is the same god damn thing is fucking laughable. Don't you even realize the irony? I at least post on-topic sometimes, unlike you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,8
>>7020092,13
>>7020092,16
Jesus fuck, why can't all of you just ignore what you don't like? You're just making it worse.

[Suigin !mercury/qA No.]

>>7020092,19
>Why don't you go spam aikido and other various copypasta?
because that wont solve the problem of your shitposting
>Both of you idiots accusing me of shitpostign when most of your post history is the same god damn thing is fucking laughable
yeah dude the food you cook is fucking terrible dont you dare say my food is bad you just can't you lose the rights to say that because the food you cook is bad.
>I at least post on-topic sometimes, unlike you.
posting "my waifu is not a slut XD" 500 times doesnt mean your on topic posts are good

[Suigin !mercury/qA No.]

besides shitposter he's a fucking retard too

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,21
>because that wont solve the problem of your shitposting
No, but if it'd solve yours if you stopped doing it. Which you won't.
>yeah dude the food you cook is fucking terrible dont you dare say my food is bad you just can't you lose the rights to say that because the food you cook is bad.
Nice attempt at deflecting the issue. You calling someone else a shitposter is hypocritical and has no weight when you do the same thing. Are you too stupid to realize that, or something?
>posting "my waifu is not a slut XD" 500 times doesnt mean your on topic posts are good
I don't even post in threads like that anymore, and haven't in a long while. I actually contribute to figure threads, and I post in other on-topic threads as well, I can't remember the last post I saw from you that wasn't spam, in a metathread or otherwise shitposting.

[Anonymous No.]

I have been an atom, a goat and a mountain. I have seen the stars and blown as a brisk wind through ancient twilit fjords, tousling the hair of young skraelings on distant worlds. I have lived in the minds of men and beasts. I have known ultimate pleasure and come near to true enlightenment: I have seen the mind of a god. But I am a man. I owe all this to an amazing friendship that came out of nowhere. Or rather, the friendship began before either of us were aware the other existed.

I live on a hill in the city, near to a lake. A hundred years ago, when the city was young, the lake was a giant swamp, but as people moved in to the area it was cleaned up into a nice park. Now the water is blue and clear, except for a few algae-ridden weeks in the summer, and it laps gently on grassy banks. A concrete path, divided into lanes for walking and biking, runs through the park all the way around the lake - a circumference of around three miles. It's really convenient for me because I can jog down there in the morning, run around the lake, and be back home in time to shower and catch the bus for work. But it's also a nice place to meander around on the weekends. There are always a lot of interesting people there.

Near the northwest corner of the lake is a small, muddy island, peeking maybe five feet out of the water. Trees have taken advantage of that small purchase and spread their branches out over the surrounding waters, and you have to maneuver around logs and underwater branches for a while before you can land a boat there. From the shore, it looks like a hemisphere of leaves rising from the lake. Within sight of the island, as the path curves around the lake, is a boxy brick building that used to be a bathhouse eighty years ago and now is derelict - a storehouse for the boat center. I was walking past that building one Saturday in mid-October when I met her for the first time.

[Anonymous No.]

It was a sudden and odd feeling. I felt for a split second that I was walking through someone else's dream. But before I had a chance to be surprised, the eerieness passed and the world flipped back to normal. My mind reeled, and as I recovered, something caught my eye. A girl - was she there before? - was sitting on an old log that the park preserved as a home for birds and small animals. She was looking away from me towards the water, and playing with something in her hands. It glinted silver in the cloudy light. I glanced away, but something caught in my mind and I glanced back. She was not only young - around six or seven, it looked - but also eerily diminutive: she was in all respects about three quarters the size of a normal girl her age. Her head was about as big as two of my fists put together, her features delicate and gracile. She would have been light-framed even if she were normal sized, and her hair was long and dull brown. As she sat on the log her expression was blank and listless and she took no notice of the world.

I saw no adult nearby and I started to wonder if she was safe. The wind was blowing and her hair whipped around her long face. Hesitantly I walked over to the log. I realized I had no idea what to say. How do you address a child who has nobody watching over her, but is sitting by herself as quietly and calmly as ever, completely unworried? I remembered when I was that age and I got lost at the fair. Just being without an adult completely freaked me out and I started bawling. A kindly old lady helped me to find my school group, who were in fact just in sight fifty feet away. I couldn't imagine being so young all on my own and yet so placid.

[Anonymous No.]

"Excuse me, miss," I said awkwardly. But I didn't actually say it, because the moment the words formed in my mind the girl's back tensed and she turned her expressionless face to look at me, silencing me completely. After a second, her eyes opened the slightest bit wider and she spoke to me. "Where did you come from?" she said. Her voice was husky as if she had a sore throat.

"I, I, I'm Anders," I said, as if that answered her question. But apparently it did, because she looked me up and down and when she looked back at me there was a hint of a smile in her eyes. "I don't know you," she said. "You are kind, though." She looked down at the thing in her hands and I saw that it was a little silver bangly thing, with four or five oddly shaped links all falling over and through each other.

"What are you holding there?" I said. She looked back at me with grey-green eyes. "It's a puzzle," she said. "I'm trying to get it to come open. It's supposed to come apart." It looked like one of those little metal puzzles that you get at magic stores, the ones that seem like they're hopelessly linked together, but then suddenly you get them apart and you can never remember how you did it. "Can I try?" I asked.

[Anonymous No.]

She hesitated for a moment and then held out the puzzle. I walked over and took it from her hand. There were more links than it had seemed when she held it, and I jingled it around for a few seconds to no avail. "I figured out how to fix it a bit but I don't know what to do next," the girl said. I handed it back to her and she fiddled with it for a bit and showed it to me.

It seemed to have less links than before.

I was pretty amazed. "That's really neat," I said, and she put it in a pocket after a second, and glinted at me with her eyes. I remembered why I had walked over to her. "Are your parents around?" I asked.

She looked at me askance and said, "I can't tell you, you're a stranger." She didn't seem to be too alarmed at this, though. Perhaps she knew not to talk to strangers but hadn't quite acquired the proper associated fear. I needed to persist. "Are you here all by yourself?"

"No, I have the ducks to keep me company, and the lake to keep me warm," she replied impishly. "And I have you now too. Are you my friend?" Her face revealed a flash of something I couldn't identify. Some kind of sadness?

[Anonymous No.]

I was surprised, both at the strange question and at the sudden hint of color in this inexpressive creature's face. "Umm, I met you five minutes ago," I said. I was about to say something more, I don't know what, when a voice called out across the grass.

"Esther! Esther, what are you doing?" The girl flickered as if a sudden cloud had obscured the sun, which was odd because it was already quite cloudy. She turned towards the voice, which turned out to be a blonde woman in her late twenties carrying a canvas tote bag and wearing a thick sweater. "Mom, I made a new friend!" She said. The mother glanced at me in uncertainty and turned back to her daughter. "Sweetie, it's time to go to Kendra's house and I have to do some errands," she said. "I've got your jacket for you, now let's go to the car. Come on, honey."

"But I have to stay here, mommy. I want to talk to Anders." I remembered I had told her my name.

"This man has to go now, honey. Come on, let's go back to the car." The woman didn't meet my eyes as she herded her daughter away from me, while the girl put up typical six-year-old struggles. I realized I hadn't said anything to her. Caution is understandable, I thought, seeing your daughter talking to a strange burly man like she knows him.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

Real mature. That's right, spam like a child instead of actually replying like an adult when you have no argument. I'm glad you've finally accepted what you are.

[Anonymous No.]

The whole thing was rather odd, and I stood at the log for around a minute. Why had she called me a friend so soon after calling me a stranger? The wind blew gently and the few people on the path walked by, absorbed in their own affairs. But then I dismissed it from my mind and continued on my way around the lake.

The next day was really the day it all started. I woke up earlier than usual. I can never remember my dreams, but most of them are fuzzy, interminable affairs with trailing threads that I have to gradually shake off as I approach wakefulness. This day, however, my dream actually worked itself to a conclusion and dumped me out fully awake into the world. The memory of the dream drifted away, but I remained amazingly alert and rested. I sat up and checked the clock - it was 5:30 AM. The world was still dark.

Early dawn may be my favorite time of day, but it's rare that I ever get to experience it. I jumped out of bed and realized that I wanted to go running, so I quickly brushed my teeth and put on a sleeveless shirt and some running shorts. It was going to be cold, but I was used to it; a little chill keeps me moving quickly and if I wear too much, then I eventually get unpleasantly sweaty and hot. I donned my shoes and went out into the dark morning.

[Anonymous No.]

The cloud cover was thick and the dark sky was tinged with the barest beginning of dawn by the time I reached the lake. It had rained overnight and a bunch of slick, dark leaves were strewn over the concrete and gravel. The paths were almost empty, but a few stoic locals were running and walking their dogs. They were all wearing sweatshirts. As my warmth melted away, I realized that it was after all much colder than I had thought. There was nothing to do but run faster. Halfway around the lake, the wind picked up and a fine mist of cold rain began to fall. My thin clothes were soon soaked and the skin on my face and chest went half numb. I touched my face and it felt like dolphin skin, clammy and thick.

I decided to take the bus, so I headed for the bus stop. A short while later, the bus had stopped at a traffic light outside of the library when all of a sudden this huge black snake head with retarded-looking eyes pops through the window and screams loudly "HAVE YOU READ YOUR SICP TODAY?" With almost no thought I departed the bus, and I ran inside as quickly as possible; the snake head was now chasing me around as I frantically searched for the legendary book among the shelves. I spotted the distinctive blue cover and ran toward it, the huge head inches from my ass. With great force I pulled the book from the shelf and instinctively directed it at the black head which by now was dripping with saliva at the mouth. It disappeared as it made contact with the book, disintegrating into a flurry of glowing parentheses.

[Anonymous No.]

I sat there dazed for a few seconds, watching the feathery parentheses slowly become smaller and fade away into nothingness. Slowly, I stood up, still clutching the purple book. I wondered about what I should do with it, then decided to put it back on the shelf. After doing so, I walked back out to the exit and boarded a bus, for where I did not know. The bus driver looked strangely familiar as I dropped the coins into the farebox;

"HAVE YOU READ YOUR SICP TODAY?" he suddenly yelled at me. Oh fuck, I thought to myself. Now I knew why he looked so familiar: He was The Sussman!

"Umm... no," I responded weakly. Suddenly his head looked a lot darker than it was a moment ago, and an evil grin appeared across his face. The bus's doors slammed shut and The Sussman's face turned an almost negroid black. His left hand shot at me and I could see that it was not a hand, but the head of a snake which protruded from its end. I turned around and ran towards the back of the articulated bus.

[Anonymous No.]

"Let me show you the power of Satori," The Sussman said in a deep hiss. His snakelike arm extended from his body towards me as I continued to run for what seemed like eternity towards the longbus's rear door.

"Longbus is loooooooooooooooooooooong", I thought to myself as I continued to run, the snake's head fast approaching. The bus seemed to go on forever. After a while, I passed the driver's seat. WTF, I thought. Ahead of me was The Sussman, standing in the aisle facing the same direction as me, with his left arm pointed forward.

I looked behind me, and saw the snake head was still approaching; I had managed to outrun it for a bit, and it was racing towards me. RECURSION! I jumped into the stepwell just as the head gained a sudden burst of speed, piercing through The Sussman and sending bright glowing parentheses everywhere. I watched first his body, then his hands disintegrate in the same manner that the head had earlier. The long black arm, floating in mid-air, slowly disappeared into a cloud of these glowing parentheses, and the snake's head, which I now noticed had come through the windscreen along with me, did the same after a few moments.

I stepped over to the driver's seat, looking for the door release switch. I found what appeared to be the switch and toggled it, but the doors did not open. Shortly after, a low hissing sound emanated from the bus itself, followed by the loud booming cry of "HAVE YOU READ YOUR SICP TODAY?", which felt as if it was coming from inside my head. Suddenly everything turned black.

[Anonymous No.]

A woman stood there, entirely naked. Her hair blew in wet waves around her head. Her skin was covered with flecks of rain. Her breasts stood out deliciously and generously from her finely-formed frame. From her head to her heels she was golden, curvaceous and real - real both because nothing about her was fake or affected and because she seemed utterly solid and inevitable. She was absolutely beautiful and when I looked at her I felt strongly in two ways. First, that I knew her well, or that somehow she fit exactly with me, as if I had out of the blue found something I had dreamt from whole cloth. Second, that I wanted to grab her savagely, bring her mouth to mine and kiss her with desperate passion, kiss her all up and down her rain-wet body, suck on her perfectly-formed nipples, and never stop touching her, lying under her in the grass breathing gently after we become tired, holding my arm around her body as she drifts into sleep. I looked up at her, hesitant to move. It was only when she smiled and shifted her weight slightly that the fact hit me: She was not some extension of myself, some manifest thought of mine. She was filled with a life all of her own.

I stood there for a second in awe and sat down on the ground. Although the rain had not stopped, the grass was mostly dry. The all-pervading wetness of October was gone and instead I felt a hopeful humidity all around me. I sat there in the blue dawn and felt something begin deep inside me, a new idea twisting with potential. I closed my eyes. The warmth that blew around me kindled a warmth in my body. Although my eyes were shut, I felt my whole self filled with light that glowed softly golden. I was aware of every part of myself, all filled with this light. A great lamp shone deep within my torso, brighter and brighter, pumping through the ventricles of my heart, beams coruscating through my mind, down along my spine, through my kidneys, down to my feet..

[Anonymous No.]

When I finally came around by the island, the morning was kindling in the deep blue sky. The basin of the lake reverberated like a bell and the sound, which was beneath human hearing, was translated into that living blueness. As I ran, I couldn't help but mull over my odd conversation with the solitary girl. It really was beyond explanation, what with the weird bangle and her strange but subtle shifts of mood. My thoughts were interrupted, however, when I suddenly felt the same strange dreamwalking feeling again. It was as though I had crossed an invisible line. The wind suddenly changed directions and the new gust blew warm.

The bliss was almost shocking. The wind blew around me and over my wet skin. Numbed limbs and muscles awoke to what felt like the warming breath of spring. The air was tangible and thick with healing, and carried not the smell but the essence of a whole forest of awakening flowers and newly growing plants. The inner rhythm that kept my feet moving fled right out of me and I stopped on the grass. I closed my eyes and felt acutely that I could expand through the warm air like ink dropped on wet paper. The wind blew through me with life and the unexpected gift made me fill with gratitude. The wind still blew warmth softly around me, but the heartbreaking glow was gone. I opened my eyes.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

I guess shitting up /jp/ isn't enough for you anymore, huh? I'd post an anime image for you, but alas I can't.

[Anonymous No.]

I awoke to find myself still inside that mysterious bus, which was completely empty. The engine was still running, and it was still parked outside the library. "The library! Of course!" I thought to myself. As if my mind had been read, the front doors swung open and I ran from the bus toward the library, which also looked empty. I entered the building and frantically ran to where I had found the prized book earlier. The book was still there, and I grabbed it instinctively, then walked to the checkout. All but one counter was open, and there was a little Asian girl standing there; the place was deserted except for me and her. I put the book on the counter and she looked at it for a moment, then at me. "Have you read your SICP today?" she asked.

I came up to my knees in front of her. My face was on level with her chest a couple feet away from her. She said nothing, but her face broke into a full smile and she put her hand underneath my chin, looking at me. It was with that touch, feeling her hand's heat against my face, that I knew that she and the glow that had burned through me were somehow one and the same. I reached out my hand and gently put it against her breast. It was just a bit bigger than my hand -and my hands are pretty big! - so I traced the underside of it. She looked at me with an impish grin and took her hand from my face, putting her arms behind her back and thrusting her chest a bit towards me. I let my fingers sink into her breast, my thumb pressing down her nipple, which sprang right back up as I passed over it. Her breast was soft but more dense than I was used to in my limited experience. Or, I should say that it was denser than usual for her size. I moved my hand and let it fall slightly back into its natural perkiness.

[Anonymous No.]

"You too?" I replied. "Have some tits and then GTFO and read your SICP!", she angrily unexpectedly shouted, then pulled up her shirt to show me her tits. She shoved the book into my hands and disappeared almost spontaneously amidst the dark area of the counter.

I left the library, and waited at the bus stop. The previous bus was no longer there. The girl I saw earlier walked up to me and looked at the Wizard Book I was holding, then glanced down at my crotch.

[Anonymous No.]

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING STANDING THERE LIKE AN IDIOT? READ IT!" she suddenly shouted. Astounded, I quickly opened the book and started to read the first chapter. I was so intrigued by the book that I didn't notice she had begun to give me a blowjob. When I looked down, she took his mouth from my cock to angrily shout "GO BACK TO READING YOUR SICP" and so I did. I didn't even notice that I came until after she told me to stop reading. Reverently I ran my hands down her body on either side from her armpits down to her knees. In a bit, out a bit, back in along the thighs. Rainwater ran with my hands and beaded up after they had passed. I took hold of her lower back and placed a slow kiss right under her bellybutton. Her skin felt soft but at the same time tight with vigor and life, an electric warmth against my lips. Gradually I traveled in a string of kisses up the center of her stomach until the top of my head grazed her breasts. Instead of shoving my way through the soft canyon I slowly stood up into a crouch and began again with a kiss right on the top of her cleavage, journeying up past her collarbone and her solid but graceful neck. I paused for a moment to look into her eyes as I stood up to my full height. Her face was full of an amazing joy that was beyond my understanding. Years and years of patience and starvation cracked and revealed an untouched soul.

[Anonymous No.]

I embraced her tightly to me and kissed her tender and long. I would say that it was the best kiss of my life, but taking into account subsequent events I can't stand by that statement. Suffice it to say that the moment our lips touched, I ceased to be a man and became instead a pair of lips, opening and closing, caressing, totally subsumed in the movement and transformation of the mouth I was kissing, and when she gave me her tongue I accepted and reciprocated. It may seem silly to say but even her tongue was full of life and joy, quick but tender. I spread my hands across her lower back, my fingers just barely dimpling the top of her glorious ass. The kiss was passionate, strong but not savage, and every deep breath spooled out into turbulent rivers of time.

A short while later, the bus arrived and I boarded, relieved to see the bus driver acting normally. She remained at the stop, presumably to wait for a different bus. Throughout the ride to my place near the lake I nervously glanced at the windows hoping the head would not reappear.

She was gone and I hadn't even said a single word to her once we boarded the bus. But as I looked around in a daze, feeling again the touches of the brisk autumn breeze, I stepped on something.

A silver blacksmith's puzzle.

[Anonymous No.]

God damn, now we have spam in /ghost/ too?

[Anonymous No.]

I grabbed the puzzle from the ground. It was maybe a little bit more coppery, maybe a little bit bigger, but I was sure it was the same one that the little girl had shown me the day before. Esther? Was that her name? I jangled it around for a bit, still basking in the glow of the impossible thing that had just happened to me. Just like before, it was really tough to get an idea of exactly how many parts there were in the thing. There were around six links or so, but as soon as I thought I had a count I discovered another ring or realized that I'd started on the wrong one and had to start over. I couldn't get a fix on it, but I was beginning to get serious chills from the wind and the rain. As far as I could tell, the area was completely empty. I had to start running again.

As I ran, as my body began to stoke its own furnaces against the pervasive cold, the amazing joy faded into memory, and all of the mysteries of the past couple days piled up into one intractable question. The conversation with the little girl had been odd, but it hadn't flaunted the rules of our universe like the encounter with the glowing woman. However, the strange blacksmith's puzzle seemed to link both meetings. Who was I dealing with here? Were these two people somehow the same? But then, I met that girl's mom and then they drove off in a car. None of it fit together, and the puzzle jingled in my pocket. All I knew was my stomach felt as though a thunderstorm were brewing there, and my mind reeled as if I was standing on the brink of a huge C++. I was too shaken to know whether I was bewildered, terrified or falling in love. I ran the rest of the way around the lake and up the hill to my house as if fueled by righteous anger.

[Anonymous No.]

By the time I got home, the grey morning had fully dawned. I was scheduled to begin my shift in fifteen minutes, but instead I called in late and took a long, hot shower. Warmth seeped back into my bones and I calmed down enough to face the day. When I got to my job my manager gave me a lecture and a warning for coming in late, but the day was good overall. Everybody seemed to be charged with that autumn energy that emanates from the friction of dry leaves as they blow around in piles on the pavement. I couldn't stop revisiting that morning in my mind, playing it over and over, remembering the golden power just under her skin, the exuberant goodwill that I felt from her. On the bus back home I took her puzzle out and set out determinedly to solve the thing.

The rings were connected each to at least two others, and they weren't quite circular. There was also a piece that looked like a bulbous U, prevented from disconnecting with the others by its odd shape. I flipped pieces over and through in many ways but I wasn't able to make a real change in the thing's configuration. I had gotten one of the rings over to a different part of the U and was trying to flip the others around or through it when the bus arrived at my stop. My heart pounded in my ears. I jumped to my feet, shoved the puzzle in my pocket and ran out of the door, making a direct line not for my house but for the lake. If there was any chance at all, I needed to meet her again. The sky darkened and the clouds thickened. Rain began to fall suddenly. I looked up just in time to see a huge black snake head forming amongst the clouds.

[Anonymous No.]

"HAVE YOU READ YOUR SICP TODAY?" it asked.

I ran past the old bathhouse to where I had first seen the little girl. I crossed the line where I had felt the dreamwalking feeling before but I was too excited to notice anything. Panting, I neared the log where I had talked to her and sat down on it myself. The lake was forest green under the clouds and the wind moved the cattails sporadically back and forth, but whoever, whatever it was I had met those times showed no sign of themselves. After a few minutes of growing disappointment, I stumbled down to the lakeside.

"Ummm, hello? Are you there?" I said softly, speaking to the wind and the ripples, hopefully out of earshot of the people on the path behind me and the head in the sky, which the other people didn't seem to notice, nor did they the darkening of the sky. A duck swam by, eyeing me skeptically. "I really want to see you again. This morning..." The wind picked up a bit. A couple leaves floated by, landed in the water. Nothing happened. "Who are you!" I shouted, more loudly than I intended, and my voice broke. I turned and strode back up the hill, the head still glancing ominously at me from its place in the clouds.

[Anonymous No.]

I was falling in on myself with frustration. Wheels in my mind were turning and grinding without any fruit. I must have looked terrible because everybody on the path seemed to be staring at me. A couple I passed glanced at me and the woman made a whispered remark to the man. When I looked at them they shifted their gaze straight ahead in embarassment. I felt extremely self-conscious and picked up the pace. But as I came to the next bend, who should come walking around the other side than my friend Jenna.

She actually saw me before I saw her. "Hey! Anders!"

I groaned silently. This was not the time for friendly conversation. I knew Jenna from a project I had gone on into the mountains to build trails a few years back. It had been a fantastic trip. In those three weeks, I made some lifelong friends. Normally I would have loved to stop and chat, but I was feeling seriously shaken and bewildered and I wanted to get home. I put on a smile which must have looked slightly strange on my preoccupied face and greeted her. "Hey Jenna, what's up? How are you?"

[Anonymous No.]

"Just great! Yeah, I'm almost done for the day so it's lucky I met you. What's up with you?" Jenna was blonde and pretty small, at least compared to me. She had a compact body that went up and down mountains like a goat. But her face was all round lines, bright eyes and a slightly flat nose. She had an infectious, hardy liveliness that often helped me out when I was struggling on the project, but she was often a bit blunt. I liked hanging out with her, especially with a group of other friends but right now I didn't want to deal with her.

"Well, I-.. I .. just got off work and I thought, What a good time for a little stroll. I love the wind this time of year." I was grasping for straws.

"Yeah, me too," she replied. "I go around twice most days, you'd think we'd meet more often." Then she paused for a second and looked at me more closely. My discomfort must have been showing. She started to go on but then stopped again. "Anders, are you okay?"

[Anonymous No.]

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm--"

"You look sort of pale. Are you sure?"

"Well, I think I might be coming down with something. I've been sort of hoarse." No lie indeed, my voice sounded like I had just eaten a curry.

"Ok, well, take care of yourself." She made as if to leave, but turned back. "We should really hang out more often, you know. Call me up sometime, maybe we can get everybody together."

"Yeah definitely, that sounds great. WVP represent." I held up my wrist with its nylon cord bracelet and she pulled back her sleeve to show hers. She flashed a smile. She suddenly looked really attractive to me, her small, firm breasts under her jacket and T-shirt complementing her slender but tough frame. Before I could shoo the thought out of my head she stepped close and gave me a quick hug.

I was surprised and ended up giving her the patented pat-on-the-back manhug. I laughed nervously. "Now you've probably got whatever I've got."

"I think I can take it," she said with a grin. She was about to say something else too but I cut her off.

"Hey Jenna, it's been nice seeing you but I've got some stuff to do at home, so.."

"All right, see you later I guess." A hint of disappointment?

"Yeah, definitely," I said. We waved to each other and began to walk away. But she shouted back to me.

"Call me, OK?"

[Anonymous No.]

The head in the sky had remained silent, but now decided to ask again in a loud booming voice: "HAVE YOU READ YOUR SICP TODAY?"

"YES!" she suddenly looked up at the sky and screamed at the head. "How could she have read the Wizard Book? Did she just become aware of the head?" I thought to myself. But there was no time for that. The black head slowly started to descend from the clouds.

"Now look what you did!" I scolded her angrily. The head had now reached an altitude where I could see its menacing grin, and it appeared to shrink to the size of a small car.

"Don't worry," she casually said, suddenly producing a copy of the Wizard Book. "I am a Knight of the Lambda Calculus."

She faced the descending head and held the book with both hands, waiting for its attack. The snake lurched forward, disintegrating into a flurry of glowing parentheses when it hit the book.

"How did you...?" I stuttered. "Because I can. You should just accept everything I say, I don't HAVE to give any reasons for my arguments because I am an EXPERT PROGRAMMER."

I grunted and continued on towards home. I felt unstable at some fundamental level, unable to go back over the conversation and determine how strangely I was acting. Jenna was also acting strange somehow, but I wasn't really able to understand that either. I felt a bit of regret for leaving her so abruptly, so I decided to call her up later. It had been a while since we had seen each other. I just had to get home for the night, have dinner, relax in a warm chair, a warm bed.

Through the whole evening I felt a yearning resonate in me, the memory of that girl harping a deep note on a cello string in my gut. I carried it with me that night into sleep.

[Anonymous No.]

The sky was light and the wind was blowing early the next morning. I awoke out of a cloud of amazing dreams, which although they all blurred together in my memory had all touched on the fantastic encounter the day before. I sat up in bed. I suddenly realized that I didn't care who or what was in the waters at the lake, I wanted to join it, be a part of it, that I had already fallen in love. The whole mystery that obsessed me yesterday was of no consequence, or rather, now I realized that I needed to fully abandon myself to it rather than solve it.

As this feeling crystallized in my head, quite from nowhere I had a breakthrough concerning the blacksmith's puzzle. I hopped out of my bed and retrieved it out of my pants pocket. I focused on it entirely and unconsciously and although I can't tell you exactly what I did, the steps came clear and unbidden straight to me, and step by step I put the puzzle through its changes. When I was done, the links were still inextricably bound together, but I had been able to break up a large cluster into two symmetrical subunits that were both still linked to the central U. The understanding of the solution slipped away from me as soon as I tried to figure out what I had done. But I was certain what I had to do now.

There was no hurry. My work schedule didn't cross my mind once. I slipped into a new T-shirt, jeans and a jacket and walked straight down to the lake through soggy leaves and brisk fall air. After grabbing a coffee at one of the little stands across the street from the park, I reached the lake and walked towards the bathhouse.

[Anonymous No.]

I knew as soon as I crossed the line that something was drastically different. Before, walking across the line had been like walking into a dream, and for a little bit when you were inside you forgot what things were part of you and which were not, but the feeling quickly passed. Now it was almost a tangible barrier. I crossed it and felt like I was walking into water, making a splash that sent out ripples in unseen directions. Every step was a push through deep fluid, and as I walked I felt an awareness build up around me, all through every part of the air, the bushes beside me, the path under my feet, and I partook in it as well. Everything around me awoke and became more and more hyperfocused on me. Standing on a hill above the water, I brought my hand out of my pocket and held out the puzzle. I was astonished to see that it was glowing pearly white and frantically going through changes, adding rings, twisting patterns, often in three states at the same time. The world trembled like a wave and the sky glowed twisty purple and I got the impression of two great eyes rising over the horizon, bending distance, pulling me into them.

I spoke and the universe spoke with me: "SHOW ME"

Space came unwound and gushed forth in crazy geometries like jpeg artifacts freed from their picture. I could feel my mind unspooling out of the cramped recursive loops that create consciousness, my mind stretching itself out flat and revealing its fundamental structure. The last sensation I had was a crazy, reckless, righteous elation, expanding to fill all the universe.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

Age. I think I'll go watch some anime. I might take some screencaps if there are any really reaction image-worthy moments, and then I'll post them on /jp/ later.

[A.J.chama No.]

>>7020092,29 >>7020092,29 >>7020092,29 >>7020092,29 >>7020092,29 >>7020092,29
>>7020092,29 >>7020092,29 >>7020092,29 >>7020092,29 >>7020092,29 >>7020092,29

Funniest post of the week.
Sudo, you're a riot.

You and Sion are also like the only people who get banned these days, which should probably be telling you something! I can spell it out for you if you haven't figured it out.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,52
>You and Sion are also like the only people who get banned these days
Huh? I've only been banned twice, ever, and neither time was for posting anime screencaps. Sorry, but you're gonna have to use another argument if you want to keep spamming your "report Sudo for shitposting" copypasta on /jp/, because it's falling on deaf ears.

[Suigin !mercury/qA No.]

>>7020092,23
>No, but if it'd solve yours if you stopped doing it. Which you won't.
Sadly I don't even post anymore, I just lurk but seeing a good thread being ruined by your shitposting makes me cringe, at least I ruined shitty off topic threads
>Nice attempt at deflecting the issue. You calling someone else a shitposter is hypocritical and has no weight when you do the same thing. Are you too stupid to realize that, or something?
Just because it's "hypocrital" doesn't mean I have no right to tell you to stop shitposting you fucking retard
>I don't even post in threads like that anymore, and haven't in a long while. I actually contribute to figure threads, and I post in other on-topic threads as well, I can't remember the last post I saw from you that wasn't spam, in a metathread or otherwise shitposting.
yes responding to posts insulting you with more shitposting doesnt make it fine either how many threads did you derail with your autism (incoming LOL U SAID MEME I AM GOING 2 IGNORE UR POST, it's not a meme, it's your mental condition if you can't see how much of a shitposter you are)

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,54
>Sadly I don't even post anymore
I saw you post like a week ago.
>seeing a good thread being ruined by your shitposting makes me cringe
Care to give some examples? I don't think you can.
>it's not a meme, it's your mental condition if you can't see how much of a shitposter you are
Yes, you clearly know more than licensed psychiatrists and psychologists. You're a meme-spewing idiot, face it.

[Anonymous No.]

Shut the fuck up you goddamn imbeciles. Nobody cares about your e-rivalry.

[Anonymous No.]

Sudo can't be this stupid right? I mean he knows he's a shitposter and is now just trolling right?

[Anonymous No.]

I love Sudo.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,55
Sudo make me a sandwich.

[Suigin !mercury/qA No.]

>>7020092,55
>I saw you post like a week ago.
I don't post regularly anymore thats what I meant
do you want me to explain everything with balls and sticks?
>Care to give some examples? I don't think you can.
I could go around surfing through your 5k post history of bad posts all day but i have better things to do here's an example though
http://archive.easymodo.net/cgi-board.pl/jp/thread/6924810#p6925646
>Yes, you clearly know more than licensed psychiatrists and psychologists. You're a meme-spewing idiot, face it.
God, I bet you think anything that was repeated more than ten times is a meme, you are a fucking retard.

[Anonymous No.]

All three of you are retarded.

cirnohijack.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,61
cirnoeatingcandyfromahat.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,62
walfascirnohooray.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,63
confusedcirnowithfrozenfrog.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,63
cirnocry.jpg

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,60
>I don't post regularly anymore thats what I meant
Yeah, sure it was.
>I could go around surfing through your 5k post history of bad posts all day but i have better things to do here's an example though
Yes, you have better things to do, like spam this board with your copypasta folder. That's clearly a much more productive use of your time.
Also, you cleverly ignored my many on-topic and useful posts in that thread before it was derailed with people attempting to troll me. You can't just cherry-pick like that.
>God, I bet you think anything that was repeated more than ten times is a meme, you are a fucking retard.
It's a forced meme that idiots brought over from /v/. You'd think that you'd be aware of what constitutes a meme, since you're so familiar with them. Also, your prior claim of "I only ruin shitty threads" is pretty funny. It's still shitposting, no matter what thread it's in. Just because you deem it to be a bad thread doesn't make it okay, you know.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,65
cirnoingrassfieldwithbutterflies.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,67
cirnofailingamathtest.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,68
cirnostyle.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,69
>9
cirnosparklingeyes.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,69
dioxincirnograzeattack.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,70
pointingcirnowithbackgroundcirclenine.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,69
shockedcirnolookingatcomputer.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

A+ would read again

[Anonymous No.]

Epic SICP story is epic.

[Anonymous No.]

walfaskaguyatippingovertable.swf

[Anonymous No.]

Is Sudo too stupid to know that autism is a real disability and not the EPIC WEEEEN meme he thinks it is?

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,77
Are you too stupid to know that most people who actually use the word on /jp/ don't really know what it means? I've known actual autistic people before.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,78
Calm down no need to get so angry.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,79
I ain't even mad.

[Anonymous No.]

Actually, you are quite mad.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,81
Yeah, I'm actually furious. You've got me all figured out.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,82
There is more than one definition for mad.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7020092,83
I know. Neither of them applies to me, though.

[Sakura !RAILgUnr8s No.]

I think you people need to learn to take it easy.

[Anonymous No.]

This is a terrible thread.

Be ashamed.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,86
poutingcirno.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

reimurapingcirnocausingcirnotocommitsuicide.jpg

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,88
cirnolaughingbecausefairiescantdie.jpg

[Kuroko spammer No.]

I'm glad to see /jp/ can manage without me. Never change, /jp/!

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,89
If you think about it, that might actually be quite depressing.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7020092,91
What's depressing is that you're reading this thread.