/lit/ - Literature

>>13836441
lord jim is my favorite book, I don't care about this hypothetical situation
what's your actual favorite book OP

The Theory of Games and Economic Behavior by John von Neumann and Oskar Morgenstern.

That or Leviticus from the Old Testament :3

>>13836449
my favorite book is Notes From Underground but i got ridiculed on /lit/ for my preference a few times

How to Avoid Thots and Pursue Truth by me desu
Now fuck off

>>13836441
No Longer Human so that people know I know of foreign literature, and that I'm a dark depressed edgelord

>>13836458
this guy fucks

>>13836462
this. fuck hoes. pursue knowledge

>>13836458
Can you please remind us of the story of how butterfly masterbated to you

It does not matter at all what you say, only the way in which you say it matters.

>>13836441
I could kill this woman with a single strike. It's amazing how much better men are than women

>>13836441
>I like the Tao te ching

>>13836500
um actually sweaty, ronda rousey would obliterate you and leave you crippled in the ring. so take your toxicity elsewhere

>>13836441
Just tell the truth as in any situation like this. You can spot a bullshitter a mile off.

My favourite book is Bonfire of the Vanities. Of course I have read more challenging, dick swinging books but it’s a fucking great read.

>>13836483
Which time? :3

>Are you seriously asking me what my favorite book is? I have more “favorite books” than you can even count. Anyone who has a singular “favorite book” is a fucking pleb who doesn’t understand the beauty of literature.

>>13836511
i agree that you should be honest. no book is objectively superior. my favorite book is paper towns.

can someone please post the art thot / egirl pic from the thread that got removed

>>13836441
Notes from the underground because it's my favorite book

>>13836500
chacked and based

>>13836529
crime and punishment is better

>>13836441
pretentious cumbrain. read for yourself and not hoes. i pity the weak, primitive troglodytes like you.

>>13836458
based :3 poster

>>13836513
did she actually?

>>13836441
Blood Meridian. Works pretty well. Having a well-formed contrarian opinion that McCarthy's grammar is a good artistic choice is a good conversation point.

>>13836592
that isn't contrarian, everyone loves his style

>>13836606
Depends. Lots of people I've met don't like McCarthy. You got some of the uptight English majors who get wet when they add the commas in. If they agree with you, you can make fun of the people who don't.

>>13836581
Yes

The Count of Monte Cristo
Is that a good response?

>>13836653
High school tier. Go for Ulysses

>>13836441
Kurt Vonnegut, Fantasy, and Sci-Fi

>>13836441
I say the Bible in order to filter out the filthy non-believers. My goal is to find an unadulterated Christian wife.

I like Michelle Obama

>>13836694
I didn’t really enjoy Ulysses though
Most of it went over my head.
Are you suggesting that I should lie to a potential sexual intercourse partner?

>>13836833
If you're trying at an art hoe, yes, because she'll probably be lying too. If it's any other girl who isn't lit, just say that you read and it'll be enough.

>>13836441

>>13836441
My favorite book is Moby-Dick but I feel self-conscious telling people about it because it’s known for being long and boring. The mildly informed ones sometimes say “isn’t that like 3/4 whale facts and 1/4 plot?” And I mutter “not exactly” then if it comes out I’ve read it four times and have paragraphs of it committed to memory people look at me like I’m a mutant. Girls especially seem to have a deep rooted hate for it.

So I say my favorite is To Kill a Mockingbird, it seems to be a popular choice, and I did read it and like it (when I was 14)

Tell her "Der Einzige und sein Eigentum is my favorite book". If she hasn't read it she isn't worth my time.

>>13837236
>>13836441
Also that girl is very pretty, but also I just wish life was that beautiful to me, warm light, a cafe, a girl in a nice sweater giving a welcoming look. I’m like a 6-7/10 but only seem to attract very unstable girls

>>13837269
If you think that girl is "very pretty" you are DEFINITELY not a "6-7/10". She's below average.

>>13837284
Okay post real pretty girls then

>>13837330
Literally just go outside.

The Nigger of the Narcissus, Ten Little Niggers and Mein Kampf. I like variety.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
That or Storm of Steel

>>13837236
>Girls especially seem to have a deep rooted hate for it.
It's one of the most masculine books ever written.

I don't think I have a favorite book, but I usually answer "The Dead Zone" by Stephen King because it's one who had lots of impact on me during adolescence.

>>13837333
i go outside

i think shes very pretty

>>13836461
>my favorite book is Notes From Underground
Yikes

>>13836441
The Diary of Anne Frank
I love anne. How would a woman react if I said this?

>>13837567

>>13837567
>yikes you're a pedophile? Did you jerk off to the parts of the book where she talks about masturbating?

>>13837613
No, I just fell in love with a girl who had roses in her eyes and died in 1945

>>13836491
This is true. I'm overflowing with a desire for conversation all the time, but when I speak to women I stutter and become soft spoken, so they all try to get away from me as quickly as possible. Such is the curse of the hermit loser I guess.

>>13837651
>You fell in love with a person under the age of 18 by even a single hour, yikes i'm calling the police you sick pedo

>>13837711
>I'm overflowing with a desire for conversation all the time
That's your problem. Everything is very easy when you stop giving any fucks. JUST BE YOURSELF BRAH!

>>13836441
>What answer do you give to look cool?

>The Holy Bible but only the King James Version.

>>13837711
I know the feel. I can never talk to a girl without sounding like an illiterate idiot. I can write fairly well but my speech is shit.

The outcome depends more on your passion about the book and how authentic you are

I don't have a favorite book. The concept of a "favorite book" is stupid.

>>13837770
>w-well you're stupid! Virgin!
BTFOWNED

>>13836441
I look them dead in the eyes and say "Lolita."

>>13837335
based

>>13837788
That's only based if you're talking to a child.

>>13837788
You couldn't actually do that. If a cute girl was looking you straight on, right into your eyes, the last thing you would say is "My favorite book is lolita."

>>13837788
I said this at a college interview to a literature professor and he gave me a blank stare and there was a 5 second silence.

>>13837811
But I could do that I'm a based sociopath.

>>13837805
top kek
>>13837811
i even sing it out after they say "huh?" "Lo-lee-ta."
>>13837833
>>13837837
based

>>13837811
"light of my life, fire of my loins. my sin, my soul."

>>13836441
>haha i don't really read all that much, you know. i prefer to spend time with my circle of friends

>>13837811
I can, I have, and I will again

>>13837236
>I have paragraphs committed to memory

>>Squeeze! Squeeze! Squeeze! all the morning long; I squeezed that sperm till I myself almost melted into it; I squeezed that sperm till a strange sort of insanity came over me, and I found myself unwittingly squeezing my co-labourers' hands in it, mistaking their hands for the gentle globules. Such an abounding, affectionate, friendly, loving feeling did this avocation beget; that at last I was continually squeezing their hands, and looking up into their eyes sentimentally, as much as to say,—Oh! my dear fellow beings, why should we longer cherish any social acerbities, or know the slightest ill humour or envy! Come; let us squeeze hands all round; nay, let us all squeeze ourselves into each other; let us squeeze ourselves universally into the very milk and sperm of kindness.

>>

>>13836441
>Granny & zoey

>>13836441
My Struggle

Murakami is never a bad answer.
Exotic because Jap, well known enough and not too terrible.
If she is an art-ho, that will give you points.

>>13836441
12 rules for life.

>>13838199
Instant desert pussy

What does GR stand for?

Tell her your favorite poet and then read something from them that you know to her. Definitely if it's romantic. Never fails. Keats, every since I've started to read him, I feel more alive than before, like I've been missing out on something in my soul. One of my favorites is called Ode to a Nightingale. It goes something like this: "My heart aches, and a drowsy numbness pains..." as you look to her. There you go.

>>13836539
TBK is better

>>13837269
>seem to attract very unstable girls
So strange when you seem so stable. Anyways, which paras did you memorize?

Monadology, truly a beautiful book

Le Petit Prince. It's not a basic answer like Harry Potter or even the Count of Monte Cristo, but the book is so simple and accessible but broadly insightful that people will assume you're so very interesting.

>>13838546
Gay Renaissance

eneados

>>13838590
Wrong opinion

>>13836441
Whats GR?

>>13836441
women aren't attracted by books alone you virgin

>>13840052
(Gr)inder
It's like tinder but for gay men and traps.

Calculus of Consent

>>13837811
Why do people pretend like girls don't all love this book? I know 7 that have it as their favorite

>>13836500
based

>>13836441
WHAT'S GR YOU PUSSY ASS BITCH

>>13836475
cringe

>>13836441
Why would you answer to look cool? Answer honestly and say what you like.
I'd go with "wathership down" or "the great gatsby"

"Dhe Lord Ov Dhe Ringz"

>>13836441
>who the fuck told you that? leave me alone

>>13837749
>not the Douay Rheims
Oh wait, you’re not a based celibate

2666

>>13840608
Cute!

I loved David Copperfield. I actually cried while reading this.

This thread has taught me only one thing; how awkward and weird anons are about social interaction with the opposite sex, definitely if she happens to be attractive. Don't most of you go to high school? How can it be that bad?

>>13836500

"My favourite book is East of Eden, it's a retelling of two Bible stories wound into the lives of two families over a few generations. I always think about the characters; my favourite is Tom, struggling over his capacity for greatness and ultimately killing himself.
*sips latte* (I loudly told them I don't want any fucking heart or wheat shapes in my coffee)
I'm sorry who are you?" - ME

>>13837811
I haven't said it was my favourite book, but a female coworker of mine actually started talking to me way more after we joked about how much I liked Lolita. We're meeting for drinks on Friday.
Thanks Vladimir

>>13836441
Blood Meridian

My favorite book that would have to be The Vacation.

Give it up. Chad can read The Very Hungry Caterpillar and get more pussy than a nerd who breezes through Finnegan's Wake

>>13842607
Yea but he will never know the pleasure of appreciating her poetry

>>13842626
But he'll know the pleasure of nutting in her baby pocket

>>13840052
Goodreads

>>13840268
>>13840052
You must be new.

>>13842646
But not her mommy pocket

>>13837236
>isn’t that like 3/4 whale facts and 1/4 plot?
just tell 'em they got filtered then just walk away. works every time.

>>13837749
more like the Cringe James Version

>>13838640
1/2
I have the opening para memorized, but that’s a given. The others are...

From “Knights and Squires”
>If, then, to meanest mariners, and renegades and castaways, I shall hereafter ascribe high qualities, though dark; weave round them tragic graces; if even the most mournful, perchance the most abased, among them all, shall at times lift himself to the exalted mounts; if I shall touch that workman’s arm with some ethereal light; if I shall spread a rainbow over his disastrous set of sun; then against all mortal critics bear me out in it, thou just Spirit of Equality, which hast spread one royal mantle of humanity over all my kind! Bear me out in it, thou great democratic God! who didst not refuse to the swart convict, Bunyan, the pale, poetic pearl; Thou who didst clothe with doubly hammered leaves of finest gold, the stumped and paupered arm of old Cervantes; Thou who didst pick up Andrew Jackson from the pebbles; who didst hurl him upon a war-horse; who didst thunder him higher than a throne! Thou who, in all Thy mighty, earthly marchings, ever cullest Thy selectest champions from the kingly commons; bear me out in it, O God!
From “Cetology”
>Finally: It was stated at the outset, that this system would not be here, and at once, perfected. You cannot but plainly see that I have kept my word. But I now leave my cetological System standing thus unfinished, even as the great Cathedral of Cologne was left, with the crane still standing upon the top of the uncompleted tower. For small erections may be finished by their first architects; grand ones, true ones, ever leave the copestone to posterity. God keep me from ever completing anything. This whole book is but a draught—nay, but the draught of a draught. Oh, Time, Strength, Cash, and Patience!
From “The Specksnyder”
>As they narrated to each other their unholy adventures, their tales of terror told in words of mirth; as their uncivilized laughter forked upwards out of them, like the flames from the furnace; as to and fro, in their front, the harpooneers wildly gesticulated with their huge pronged forks and dippers; as the wind howled on, and the sea leaped, and the ship groaned and dived, and yet steadfastly shot her red hell further and further into the blackness of the sea and the night, and scornfully champed the white bone in her mouth, and viciously spat round her on all sides; then the rushing Pequod, freighted with savages, and laden with fire, and burning a corpse, and plunging into that blackness of darkness, seemed the material counterpart of her monomaniac commander’s soul.

>>13838640
>>13843743
2/2
From “The Sphynx”
>Of all divers, thou hast dived the deepest. That head upon which the upper sun now gleams, has moved amid this world’s foundations. Where unrecorded names and navies rust, and untold hopes and anchors rot; where in her murderous hold this frigate earth is ballasted with bones of millions of the drowned; there, in that awful water-land, there was thy most familiar home. Thou hast been where bell or diver never went; hast slept by many a sailor’s side, where sleepless mothers would give their lives to lay them down. Thou saw’st the locked lovers when leaping from their flaming ship; heart to heart they sank beneath the exulting wave; true to each other, when heaven seemed false to them. Thou saw’st the murdered mate when tossed by pirates from the midnight deck; for hours he fell into the deeper midnight of the insatiate maw; and his murderers still sailed on unharmed—while swift lightnings shivered the neighboring ship that would have borne a righteous husband to outstretched, longing arms. O head! thou hast seen enough to split the planets and make an infidel of Abraham, and not one syllable is thine!”

>>13838640
>>13843743
>>13843765
3/2
And I would like to memorize this someday, from “The Symphony” which is my favorite chapter, and this perhaps my favorite monologue by Ahab, it’s just very long (and good)
>And lastly from “The Symphony” my favorite chapter and maybe my favorite monologue of Ahab’s
>“Oh, Starbuck! it is a mild, mild wind, and a mild looking sky. On such a day—very much such a sweetness as this—I struck my first whale—a boy-harpooneer of eighteen! Forty—forty—forty years ago!—ago! Forty years of continual whaling! forty years of privation, and peril, and storm-time! forty years on the pitiless sea! for forty years has Ahab forsaken the peaceful land, for forty years to make war on the horrors of the deep! Aye and yes, Starbuck, out of those forty years I have not spent three ashore. When I think of this life I have led; the desolation of solitude it has been; the masoned, walled-town of a Captain’s exclusiveness, which admits but small entrance to any sympathy from the green country without—oh, weariness! heaviness! Guinea-coast slavery of solitary command!—when I think of all this; only half-suspected, not so keenly known to me before—and how for forty years I have fed upon dry salted fare—fit emblem of the dry nourishment of my soil!—when the poorest landsman has had fresh fruit to his daily hand, and broken the world’s fresh bread to my mouldy crusts—away, whole oceans away, from that young girl-wife I wedded past fifty, and sailed for Cape Horn the next day, leaving but one dent in my marriage pillow—wife? wife?—rather a widow with her husband alive! Aye, I widowed that poor girl when I married her, Starbuck; and then, the madness, the frenzy, the boiling blood and the smoking brow, with which, for a thousand lowerings old Ahab has furiously, foamingly chased his prey—more a demon than a man!—aye, aye! what a forty years’ fool—fool—old fool, has old Ahab been! Why this strife of the chase? why weary, and palsy the arm at the oar, and the iron, and the lance? how the richer or better is Ahab now? Behold. Oh, Starbuck! is it not hard, that with this weary load I bear, one poor leg should have been snatched from under me? Here, brush this old hair aside; it blinds me, that I seem to weep. Locks so grey did never grow but from out some ashes! But do I look very old, so very, very old, Starbuck? I feel deadly faint, bowed, and humped, as though I were Adam, staggering beneath the piled centuries since Paradise. God! God! God!—crack my heart!—stave my brain!—mockery! mockery! bitter, biting mockery of grey hairs, have I lived enough joy to wear ye; and seem and feel thus intolerably old? Close! stand close to me, Starbuck; let me look into a human eye; it is better than to gaze into sea or sky; better than to gaze upon God.

>>13843776
4/2
Cont.
>By the green land; by the bright hearth-stone! this is the magic glass, man; I see my wife and my child in thine eye. No, no; stay on board, on board!—lower not when I do; when branded Ahab gives chase to Moby Dick. That hazard shall not be thine. No, no! not with the far away home I see in that eye!”

>>13843780
the real moby dick was the friends we made along the way

>>13836441
Mein Kampf. Stalag edition
I bet you faggots think that DFW is prfound or you're really edgy edgy when u say lolita. just try this it blows their mind.
>omg who could u say that it wa made by nazi! hitler!
AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA do you KNOW WHO I AM?

>>13837651
Hi Jeff

I look at her and say:

"Books? Do I look like a nerd to you? Lmao I play football or rugby when I travel to the UK"

Never fails, I gotten laid like more than 500 times in my life

>>13836441
I stand up and fucking leave, because the whole concept of favourites are one of the shittiest ideas ever created by normies to make cop-out's for small talk. But if I can get past that, I'll just say whatever I recently read, because realistically, that's all a favourite is.

>>13836653
yes bc its a good book

>>13836500

>>13837227
Based and hairypilled

>>13836500
Based and violencepilled.

>>13843837
>do you KNOW WHO I AM?
Even outside of anonymous boards, I'm sure most people don't.

>>13836441
The industrial society and i'ts future

>>13836441
Fifty shades of gray because I see so much of myself in Christian Gray.

Les Miserables. It's impressive you've read such a long book, and chicks love the musical

>>13836500
is this anon - dareth I say - based?

>>13840056
No but the answer does enter into the pluses and minuses when determine if you’ll bone or not

>>13836652

"What nigga been running his mouth again? I bet it was Bray-Bray"
*cocks pistol, runs out door*
Then come back in like 45 minutes with a little bit of fake blood on you and she'll be dilating

>>13836441
The Holy Bible :)

>>13846680
butterfly fucking loves me and wishes she could suck on my toes. its a fact. she just likes to play hard to get in front of you people. :3

>>13837227
fuck i used to recommend this book to my friends when i was in high school

>>13836441
i say favorite book is the story of the eye, the girls who know it get excited about it
>>13837590
Why do you keep posting her photos? do you know her? She's a nice person

>>13836511
Based honesty poster. Mother Night is definitely one of my favorites of all time. People will shit on me here for Vonnegut posting but the man can fucking write. Your favorite book doesn't have to be some big dicking brick of a thousand pages.

>>13836441
>having a single favourite book

>>13838546
General Relativity

>>13848808
>the girls who know it get excited about it
if only they were half as kinky as their literary tastes