/lit/ - Literature

>>20723751
he seems creepy. the kind of guy who would jerk off to bestiality on Christmas or some perverted shit.

>>20723751
"There might be PC gamers here" he thought to himself "with a Macbook you can surf anywhere".

>>20723751
He posted on /g/ a while back, didn't save the picture.

>>20723756
>>20723871
welcome newfriends

>>20723888

>>20723751
I assume this is the man that makes all of the apple shill threads on /g/.

>>20723888
>>20724054
That’s got nothing to do with anything.

>>20723751
jesus christ, this is the first time i've notice the guy fawkes mask.

>>20723751
Itoddlers BTFO

>>20723751
I bet you could do an American Psycho thing but with inordinate descriptions of what tech gadgets people use/ tech specs instead of clothing choices

>>20723751
"And this is my son Calvin!"
My mother would partake in this ritual each time she had brunch with a new church friend. It was as if she wanted to remind me that I exist in this world. I prefer the internet, and she prefers God.

"pc niggers could be here" he said to himself out loud

>>20723751
>I….I must CONSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

>>20723751
Nigga he an apple.

>>20723751
Wrote this as an exercise. Took me about five minutes. Written, not reviewed. No idea who this guy is or why he gets posted here, by the way. Please let me know what you think:

STORY BEGINS HERE:

I never had much growing up. My father was the sole bread-winner until I was seventeen and we always had to wait for something to go obsolete before he was able to afford it. Hence I kept on using my old VHS-player and early 2000s speakers well into the age of flat screen TVs and videogame consoles with built-in internet access.

Both my parents are gone now. Only memento I have from them is an old clock they were gifted the day of their wedding, permanently stuck on the very moment they arrived home from the ceremony, 02:34, that's small hand almost on three, large hand almost on seven.

Losing them was a harsh blow. I was only nineteen, shy, introverted, a kissless virgin with very few friends. Not popular by any means. I didn't even bothered creating a social media account using my real name, ever. Only 4chan and other obscure websites populated by other misfits like me.

Strangely enough, I became a huge fan of Dr. Dre despite holding opinions about race that most would consider extremely racist. His lyrics about growing up poor and misunderstood really talked to me despite being a skinny white kid from the suburbs. There was something magic about his music I can't quite put my finger on to this day. I got myself a couple of Beats-by-Dre headphones, the best computer I could afford on my minimum-wage salary and started producing my own songs. No lyrics, though, I was never good with words. Maybe I'll upload my work to soundcloud one day, just not now. Maybe I'll even make it to be famous and get to meet my musical heroes one day. Maybe. One day.

THE END

>>20724347
These are good character notes I would say
>compared growing up in Compton in the 60s to the early life of suburb kids
Perfect anon character

>>20724054
oh look you know a meme related to the picture in OP that no one in this thread ever referred to, that means you are le based oldfag right?

>>20723751
I had to take a massive shit. But then I realized that I would have to interrupt my web browsing. I was in the middle of browsing a particularly fascinating website, and I wondered if it was really such a bad thing to retain my crap. Surely, I thought, it could build character, just like semen retention.

Unfortunately, before I could bring my plan to fruition, I shit myself.

A small sigh escaped his lips as his penis shifted back into flaccid mode. The computer continued to play the video of two dogs humping before the bottom bitch uncouples herself to vomit. He puts this on loop almost every day (besides Friday night, that's the sabbath) to get off. His life has devolved to a point where his dopamine receptors refuse to glut themselves on anything else besides this ritual. He pricked a few tissues from the tissue box and began to clean his penis and hand of lotion, simply tossing the cum-spent tissue and its compatriots onto the ground underneath the computer desk. The grave of many other such fallen, gaunt-white soldiers. As he zipped up his pants he began to realize he was loosing sensation in his arm. A sharp pain erupted out through his chest and he began to feel the red volcanic fear overwhelm him. He jerked up, grabbing his chest as he did so. Instantly the muscles in his lungs locked up, as did the ones in his legs, and he lurched forward, slamming into the keyboard as he did so, smacking loose his consciousness from all further sensation before he slid noiselessly into the outer darkness of the frozen abyss beyond the walls of night. A merciful gesture of evolution. In 47 minutes his aunt would find him dead among spent tissues soiled in yellowing cum, a penis half hanging out of his pants zipper, a look of glazed, disinterested surprise seemingly forever pasted on his face. She would feign tears in front of the paramedics and her husband and his mother and younger brother, but inwardly she felt relief from then on. The incantation had worked. The faggot really did kick the bucket.

>>20724347
>I never had much growing up
stopped reading there, clearly incongruous with op pic, ergo opinion disregarded and I will break my fast post-haste

>>20723751
Inefficient room.
An uncomfortable man.
Waste of life, sadly

>>20723751
Apple TV, big stupid clock, cheap dirty carpet, tiny little cock---what the fuck you grinning for?

>>20725646
keep on reading. this opening statement pays off later on

>>20725561
>that means you are le based oldfag right?

>>20723751
I'm a macintosh
semisasquatch
life is branded
caught red handed
i won't even swear
this blue board
wouldn't dare
my frustration
narrative derivation

nowadays
everybody wanna talk
like they got something to say
but nothing comes out when they move their lips
just a bunch of gibberish
the blank act like they blank about blank

>>20723751
Whilst Jims chair was sat upon the holoprojection cube he was invincible. A barrier surrounded him at every possible angle, encasing him in an invisible wall of solidified photons. He was hosting a podcast where he expressed his bizarre personal lifestyle; sex with farmyard animals, increasing taxation on the poorest persons in order to finance rainbow afros for people in Zambia, and so on, things he had never done but things he wished to advocate or politically, on behalf of the mysterious hypothetical. He heard his door being caved in for the first time in the month and watched as armed police flooded into his living room. It was not the first time he had been SWATed. However this time, safe within the cube, he smiled, knowing that the policemens bullets couldn't do anything.

He came.
He sighed.
He came again,
this time harder.
A smile crept from his tight lips.
He came.

>>20724347
only good post ITT. the rest are all /b/-tier trash. barely literate retards sure flood this place during the summer, huh?

>>20727517
>kissless virgin
>good prose
lazy